Dedeous and the Revolt
by ShadowGhostWriter
Summary: This is my first play. It is basically making fun of Shakespeare's language. In this play, Kirby and his "merry" band rebel against Dedede and his empire, will they succeed? All cast is the Kirby cast.


Page 21 of 21

**Dedeous and the Revolt**

Cast of Characters

_**Cappialo's Government**_

**Dedeous**, king of Cappialo

**Dedeous II**, prince and son to Dedeous

**Lord Escragoon**, Dedeous's right hand man

**Countess Isabella**

**Baron Bonker **

**Baron Antoine**

**Kawasaki**, chef to Dedeous

**Sir Metaknight**, chief knight to Dedeous

**Knight of Sword**

**Knight of Blade**

**Knight of Axe**

**Knight of Mace **

**Knight of Javelin**

**Knight of Trident**

_**Kirbio's Rebellion**_

**Kirbio**, leader of the resistance movement

**Tiffani**, Kirbio's friend & daughter of the Duke

**Tuffucius**, Tiffani's brother

**Joe**, Kirbio's powerful and drunkard friend

**Adeleine, **starving artist

_**Other Characters **_

**The Duke**

**Various Citizens, Waddle Dees, Waddle Doos, and Rebels**

Act I

**Scene 1: Cappialo Town Square**

_Enter Kirbio, Tiffani, Tuffucious, Joe, and others._

Kirbio: O great citizens of Cappialo!

Today, we reunite, brothers and sisters!

You shalt suffer no more.

O, Dedeous! Thou art thy god to play music,

As our ashes dissolve in thou embers.

Tiffani: O demon king, king of all devils, worse than thy Giygas! He has pushed for tariffs on thou for years, Thou shalt not perish citizens. Tuffucius: Giygas, O, dear sister! What a name to say, And I pray none to speak of that name-too evil. Kirbio: Ay, I pray thee not to slip on the tongue. Tuffucius: O, lady, lady! Thou watch as thy tongue goes on and on. Joe: Your tongue is full of dysentery. Kirbio: Thou wise, boy sir! Joe: A boy or a sir? Kirbio: Your choice, thoust take one, drunk. Joe: Very well, good sir! A clown sir, a jester boy-I wish both! Drunk, ha! Ha! _Enter Adeleine._ Adeleine: O, dreadful, alack, alack! I am slain. Kirbio: Wounded, slain? I see no wound. Adeleine: Ay, ay, tis' my worst. A sentry I beg for, I get none. My masterpieces are my solitary revenue. Kirbio: His Majesty, no sentry given, thou wanted? Adeleine: O, a sentry I beg for! One to watch at my door. Kirbio: Resistance is quite the bond; Come, girl, join us; slay the monster of all monsters. Adeleine: I do not resist to resist. _Exeunt._ Scene 2: Dedeous Castle, Council Room Enter Isabella, Bonker, Antoine, Escragoon, and Waddle Dee Guards. Isabella: I fear thy worst. Antoine: Why, thou rebels are weak. I feel thy will traumatize their feeble minds. Slay their hearts to nothing, m'lady! Isabella: O, Escragoon, art thou stand, To let a devil stand by me, tell me not to fret? Escragoon: Nay, O Countess. Baron, thou shalt have to learn; We should not have too much hope. All: Ay! _Enter Dedeous II._ Dedeous II: O, what are your jests? Feign to be doodles?

Isabella: Feign? Boy, thou feign to be a lady's boy.

Dedeous II: A lady's boy? Hoar, put up your hoar sword.

Isabella: O, devilish child! Wherefore goad a woman to brandish?

Brandish your head of brandy, boy!

Antoine: O, my Prince, a resistance grows.

Lead by that villain Kirbio.

Dedeous II: A resistance? Hence the word "resist";

Kirbio is the resistance.

Isabella: Ay.

Bonker: O, that villain shalt crush with my power!

Slay him, I will, I do not resist to annihilate the resist.

Dedeous II: Slay you might, if thou not slain first.

_Enter Dedeous, followed by Sir Metaknight. _

Dedeous: What noise is this? Rally on with old gossipy noise?

Kirbio! Blossom him with swords;

That plump rose will be no more!

Escragoon: Fie, fie! My lord, settle down.

We form a compound, to reveal its destruction;

By the order of a book.

Dedeous: I know what I want.

Go to, my Council, to vanquish this rebellion!

_Exeunt all but Dedeous, Escragoon, and Sir Metaknight._

Escragoon: Sir Metaknight!

Dedeous: Slay Kirbio, weaken his merry band!

Metaknight: Slay him, my lord? Guarantee it done.

_He exits._

Dedeous: The resistance shall deteriorate.

_Exeunt._

**Scene 3: Cappialo Town Square**

Enter Tiffani and Tuffucius, followed by Dedeous II.

Dedeous II: O, you are a woman, wot?

Tell me, what is the plan you shall pursue?

Tiffani: Fair it won't be to us.

Information you will not be granted.

Tuffucius: O, we will fall into line and invade your stronghold,

And butcher you all one by one.

Dedeous II: Boy! Granted this knowledge I am.

Good day, offspring.

_He exits._

Tiffani: We give him knowledge, we fall.

It is too much to offer.

We cannot raid his citadel; it would just be too dim-witted.

Tuffucius: Sentries we might pass.

Tiffani: We will linger for his horde in the trenches.

_She exits._

Tuffucius: Potentials are endless! No more Majesty.

_He exits, enter Sir Metaknight and his band of Knights._

Metaknight: Kirbio is a fool.

Sword: So is his Majesty.

Blade: We slay both? O, we slay Kirbio, resistance falls.

Sword: O, we slay his Majesty, resistance is the scapegoat,

And they fall, still.

Metaknight: Agreed.

_He exits._

Axe: Why are we doing this?

Sword: For the chance of freedom.

Blade: (To other concerned Knights) Yes, we will succeed.

_He exits._

Javelin: We go and fight.

_Exeunt._

Act 2

**Scene 1: Cappialo**

_Enter Kirbio, Tiffani, Tuffucius, and Adeleine._

Kirbio: I think Dedeous is up to something.

Tiffani: Yes, I believe so; if the Prince shows up sweet-talking us for information.

Adeleine: Look! It's the knights.

_Enter Metaknight and his knights._

Kirbio: What do you want?

Blade: You.

_He draws his sword. _

Kirbio: Back off! What are you, a fool? To attack me in the street?

Metaknight: Back, Blade, seize.

_Blade exits, then enter Joe._

Joe: What is this? A threat?

Tiffani: Go, knights.

_Sword draws, and fights with Tuffucius._

Tiffani: Off with your head! Go, vile creep!

_She draws, and attacks Mace. Resistance enters, and joins the fray._

_Enter Isabella and army. All knights exit._

Isabella: Back you scoundrels! Or shall I strike you all down?

Joe: Come on, woman. What can you do?

Isabella: Come, fight, you immature clown.

_She and Joe draw their swords._

Joe: My sword on a woman? Oh the joy!

Isabella: My sword on a clown? Alert the news bringer!

_They fight. Isabella stabs Joe and flees with her train._

Tiffani: Oh, Joe-are you okay?

Joe: It's a mere scratch, a mere scratch…go, Tuffucius, fetch me a doctor.

_Tuffucius exits. Adeleine flees._

Kirbio: Woman! Get back here!

Joe: No, let her go. Peace is with me at last. I die a drunk.

Tiffani: Reckless you are, drunk. Tis' a scratch.

_Joe staggers, and then falls._

Kirbio: O wretched day!

Joe: O bloody day!

Anon, I fly into the light.

_He dies._

_Kirbio runs off in grief and anger._

Tiffani: O curses! Joe is dead. We are gone. O Tuffucius, help!

_Tuffucius enters, with medicine._

Tuffucius: Here we are. What is this?

Methinks I see Joe dead!

Tiffani: Your eyes are not of trickery!

Tuffucius: O, alack the day! Stab me, ye grief!

_He exits_.

Tiffani: We are doomed.

_She exits._

**Scene 3: Dedeous's Castle**

_Enter Metaknight and his "merry" band._

Blade: O, Joe is dead, sire.

Metaknight: Kirbio will blame Dedeous for this, and resistance attacks.

Sword: Struck by whom?

Axe: Isabella.

Sword: Yea, a woman? I understand. Are we ready to fight?

Axe: Preparations must be made for this brawl-come, fellows.

_Exeunt all but Metaknight, Sword, and Blade._

Blade: You sure about this, sir?

Metaknight: Positive. We have two villains in our midst.

Blade: Ay, despite your loyalty? You serve Dedeous as Heracles did to that cowardly monarch-

"Impossible" tasks to all but you.

Sword: Wherefore, Sir Metaknight, to lead you of such bloodthirsty measures?

Metaknight: We kill the blood drinker of the night. We kill who we're supposed to kill.

Blade: Thus, I brandish my sword, it will drink the blood.

Sword: Anon we will be complete.

Metaknight: Go, I must think.

_Sword and Blade exit._

Metaknight: When we strike them upon this game board, I will brawl to the end, even if I die in blood. When we kill the opponents, we win the game.

(Dedeous calls within.)

_He exits._

Act 3

**Scene 1: Cappialo Square**

_Enter Kirbio and all of the resistance; Isabella, Barons Bonker and Antoine, and their army; and Sir Metaknight and his knights._

Kirbio: Attack!

Isabella: Go, you reckless fools!

Attack any mortal enemy you encounter.

Metaknight: Knights! Strike down the villains.

_All fight- Resistance vs. Others._

Tiffani: (To Sword) Back down, you metal-hearted piece of alloy!

Sword: (To Tiffani) you dwarfish girl! (To Blade) Blade, slay the boy.

_Blade stabs Tuffucius and steps away._

Tuffucius: Oy! Methinks I've been butchered. Wherefore I go like this?

Tiffani: Go, but do not go towards the light!

_Sword stabs her and steps to the side._

Tiffani: We swarm the light with our blood.

Tuffucius: Bright light! Take me!

_He falls._

Tiffani: O, do not take him, spare his bloodied spirit!

_She falls._

Kirbio: What is this? O dreadful, alack, alack! Devils of lust, die you must!

Adeleine: Not I, for I stand beside you.

_She is seized by Waddle Dees, and exits with them._

Kirbio: My friend, standing still as a sculpture, taken by greedy thieves!

Isabella: We've won this round, Kirbio! Stand back, or face Death alone.

_Kirbio and resistance step back._

Metaknight: They have failed. We have won, you lose.

_He and his knights face Isabella._

Isabella: What is this, sir? Are you a traitorous dog?

Metaknight: Nay. You all are disgusting dogs, out, woman!

_He wounds her. Both knights and army fight and exeunt._

**Scene 2: Dedeous's Dungeon**

_Enter Dedeous and Escragoon, followed by guards seizing Adeleine. _

Dedeous: Girl, speak with your heart. What was your plan?

_Guards step to the side._

Adeleine: My plan wasn't to be here, sire.

Dedeous: Out guards, out footstool, I bring this girl to her shaking knees.

Escragoon: Don't break any of her ligaments.

_He looks at Dedeous, smiling. Dedeous smacks him upon the head._

_He and guards exit._

Adeleine: My calves too strong to fold, as so have I.

Dedeous: Back down, girl, what is your next intention?

Adeleine: Back down? I would, but I wot I have dislike for you.

Dedeous: Chow, girl, will be liver and cold milk. Ciao, it will be the end of your life.

Adeleine: I beg a question, what are you saying?

Dedeous: You want to cooperate? Gimme all your treasure and be locked away, or stay silent or lie and be condemned to die.

Adeleine: Out, your Kingship, I beg thee to free me. I tell you all you want to know.

Dedeous: Speak, vixen. Do not be stringent, or I stab you with prison keys.

Adeleine: Your stronghold we conquer, and shamble your anarchy.

Dedeous: Out, vixen! Take her away, men; do not seize to treat her harshly.

_Guards re-enter, and take her away. Dedeous exits._

Act 4

**Scene 1: Cappialo Square**

_Enter Kirbio and resistors, Metaknight, Isabella, Both Barons, and their armies. All are fighting._

Metaknight: Back down, fools! Or is this your vile end?

_The fighting stops._

Isabella: Coward! Step down and I slay you to the pavement.

Antoine: My lady! Is there suicide on your tongue?

Methinks you are foolish.

Isabella: Out, boy! I strike down a villain

With my mightiest spear.

Metaknight: We spare the strongest.

If you are a woman,

Prove it be.

_They fight. Both Barons duel Sword and Blade._

_Enter Dedeous and his train._

Dedeous: What is this, a tangled web?

Are you to kill rebels?

Not each other!

_All stop fighting._

Isabella: There is a dog here.

Dedeous: Pray thee, woman, May I inquire whom?

Before you utter a word, I have taken an artistic vixen to my lair.

All of Isabella's Army: Sir Metaknight!

_Dedeous faces Metaknight._

Dedeous: Betray your king? Bow to Death!

Metaknight: A vixen, you speak of? I'm looking at one right now.

_Half of resistance, Axe, and Javelin are taken prisoner._

Metaknight: Release your keys, King. I do not stifle you with Death.

Dedeous: Back, savage dog! Sparta blesses you with hatred.

Surrender your self, or be deprived of breath.

Metaknight: What, lose my dignity? I fight you to death.

Dedeous: Consider it done.

_He draws, and fighting continues._

Bonker: O, Kirbio! I slay your dragon heart,

And tear you like a 'chief.

Kirbio: Back, out, beast! Too much to fight.

I cannot redeem myself to kill thee.

Bonker: Down, pink! Or I flourish your body with blood!

_Kirbio stabs Bonker. He falls._

Antoine: O, speak! Good friend, do not take flight.

Do not befriend the light.

O sorrow! Beg me wherefore so cruel?

My mind lost her voice, I'm too moved

O Death! Vile, vile, Death!

Slay him not, leave me your whipping child.

Back down I must.

I fight and avenge you, friend.

_Exeunt._

Act 5

**Scene 1: Dedeous Castle**

_Enter Dedeous, Escragoon, Dedeous II, Isabella, Antoine, and their armies._

Dedeous: You call for seize?

Isabella: I did, O King.

Dedeous: Banished the knights we did,

We need to plan our chivalry's move.

Isabella: We kill Kirbio.

Escragoon: Nay, wait until they are weak. We weaken them to the shaking ground!

Dedeous: Out, footstool! Do not slay our desire.

Your strategy is a burning fire.

It will kill us all,

Even the rebels if they fall.

_Escragoon exits._

Antoine: My lord, we must act quickly, for the rebels will strike.

Dedeous: Do not betray our goals, Baron, we will win.

We take Metaknight,

Slice him after he's with his greatest desire,

The death of Kirbio.

_Exeunt._

**Scene 2: Dedeous's Dungeon**

_Adeleine, Rebels and all Knights are in their cells._

_Enter Kirbio and Rebels._

Kirbio: Two sentries are no fools,

One cannot overrule a raiding party.

Rebel: But, soft! It is Metaknight.

Metaknight: I thought you were dead.

Kirbio: Back I am.

I will not save you unless you tag me.

Metaknight: Tag I shall, I will not wait until the end.

Adeleine: O, Kirbio! Release me from these chains. (Footsteps)

O, the watch! Burrow yourself you must.

_Enter Baron Antoine._

Antoine: What is this? Kirbio!

You fell for our trickery.

You shall pay for your mockery.

Kirbio: Out, villain! I am not a fool.

_They draw swords and fight. _

_Dedeous enters but is pushed out by Rebels._

_Enter Dedeous II. _

Dedeous II: O wait! Was that mine father taken back to be plundered?

Adeleine: He is to be.

Dedeous II: Bury his body, mine beside his!

_He draws a dagger._

O, await, my father! I join you in the light.

I will be gone before the night.

Brave was I, this melee too strong.

Let the church bells bong!

_He stabs himself and falls. _

_Re-enter Dedeous._

Dedeous: My son! Bloodied his dagger is.

I use it to battle the foe.

O son, brave and honorable you were.

You left before me.

_He exits, fighting outside continues._

_Kirbio stabs Antoine, he falls._

Antoine: O, I am slain! Bury me beside Bonker!

_He dies._

_Kirbio starts to look for key._

Kirbio: I haven't won yet, but I shall!

_Re-enter Dedeous, followed by Isabella and Escragoon._

Dedeous: Death to you!

Kirbio: I am for you!

_They fight, resistance stops to watch, Isabella starts to stab rebels right and left._

_A Waddle Dee grabs the key, takes off his bandanna, and raises the Metaknight flag. _

Isabella: Slay all the Rebels! Kill all villains!

Escragoon: We protect the king. Go, minions!

Adeleine: Marry, I cannot make good art.

I'm a failure to all.

I pray all well.

_She cuts off her ear._

O, the agony! It is now part of me.

I die in pain. It burns!

_She picks up a gun._

Good-den, all, I join the light anon.

_She shoots herself and falls._

_The Waddle Dee falls after he is stabbed by Isabella._

Isabella: Down, you rebel scum! I peel you all like grapes!

Metaknight: Death to you all! I flee this tiny imprisonment.

_A group of Waddle Dees swarm his cell._

Sword: Sir! We come to relieve you of those insects!

Blade: Baron Antoine is dead.

Sword: Not him. His minions.

_Enter Chef Kawasaki._

Dedeous: Great. Him.

Kawasaki: My lord, I am sorry,

But a bribe has come to me and I have taken it.

Dedeous: What, sirrah? Out, vile potato!

_Kawasaki throws pies at Waddle Dees._

Dedeous: I end this!

_He stabs Kirbio._

Die, you villain! Release all your breath!

Kirbio: O, I am no more. Rebels, back down, we have lost.

_He falls._

_All Rebels and Knights except Metaknight flee._

Dedeous: I'm firin' the mediocre employee.

Metaknight: O, ****.

_He exits._

Dedeous: Now, all loyal subjects, return to your daily journeys.

As for Lady Isabella and Lord Escragoon, you are next in line for monarchy. New knights have been appointed, and they will be loyal through and through.

Isabella: We win, all peace is restored.

Escragoon: We rule without dangers or death.

Dedeous: I won!

_Exeunt._

_**Credits: Thanks to HAL Laboratory.**_

**Cast of the Play**

Dedeous… King Dedede

Dedeous II… Waddle Dee

Lord Escragoon…Himself (Anime)

Countess Isabella…Iron Mam

Baron Bonker…Bonker

Baron Antoine…Bugzzy

Kawasaki…Himself

Sir Metaknight…Himself

(All knights play themselves)

Kirbio… Kirby

Tiffani…Tiff (Anime)

Tuffucius…Tuff (Anime)

Joe…Knuckle Joe

Adeleine…Herself

No Kirby character was harmed in the making of this play.

Play written by Shadowsilver1916

Copyright 2010-2011


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